Legacy of Love

     Everyday I read the local obituaries in the online newspaper.  I think I started doing this a couple years ago when I retired from teaching.  Maybe because I am getting older, but I find myself reading them for several reasons.  

    First of all, of course I look to see if I know anyone who has passed.  Whether they are personally known by me or perhaps a family member of a friend or acquaintance.  But even if I don't know the person, I read through their obituary and see what they did with their life.

    I am always encouraged by the ones who leave a legacy behind that shows a life well lived.  I think that is what we all strive for, a legacy to leave behind to be remembered by after we have died.  It doesn't have to be a monumental achievement, such as an advanced degree and profession. It doesn't have to be someone who reached an advanced age, anyone at any age can leave a legacy of their life that honors their time here on earth.

    Today I read about a lady who will be remembered for her love of her family and how she dressed up as Mrs. Claus with her husband as Santa to share Christmas joy throughout their lifetime.  Yesterday I read about a lady who traveled the world and United States with her husband while he served in the Navy and after a lifetime of service she still went to school and achieved her nursing degree to work as a registered nurse to help others.  I did not know either of these individuals, but I feel enriched by reading about how they lived their lives serving others. 

    My best friend Beth left a legacy behind with the lives of her three boys, and what wonderful men they have grown up to be. She also left joy in my heart as I always remember her laugh and mannerisms and her artwork as well as the  indelible imprint she left on my life.  Her life was not long, but she certainly left a legacy behind.

    I think reading about others encourages me to live a life to leave a story behind as well.  It gives me courage to share what is in my heart in print, and to love the people around me extravagantly without reservations. 

 I want to leave a legacy of doing my best to witness about God's love and faithfulness. Not by standing on a street corner or by a showy display but by quietly living in obedience with his word as best as I can and loving others in the hope that they will want to read the bible and find the all encompassing joy and hope in faith that I have found. It's so powerful, how can you not want others to have it too. We all live messy lives, our paths are crooked and filled with both happy and challenging events. How we live and respond to those circumstances molds the legacy we leave behind.  

    My hope and prayer is that each person I come into contact with, or perhaps just the ones that will read about my life one day, will feel something that they can take with them the same way I feel when I read about others lives.  A life well lived doesn't have to be showy or extraordinary.  It just needs to leave behind a legacy of love.

Grateful, Thankful, Blessed

     November is one of my very favorite times of the year.  I love the cooler fall temperatures and the beauty of the autumn foliage, but most of all I love the focus we all share of thankfulness as we approach the holiday season.  There is an overlying presence of gratitude that comes with counting our blessings as we approach Thanksgiving and Christmas.  

    Just this week, as I was cleaning the house (a mundane chore that I do every week) I opened the patio doors to the crisp fall morning breeze and realized how truly thankful I am for simple household tasks.  I took some time to look around me and reframe my thinking as I tackled each job.  

    I am owned by a very fluffy long haired cat. She picked me out when I walked into a cats only animal shelter two years ago.  She came up to me and told me I was hers and that she would go home with me.  Willow is sweet and spicy, she loves to cuddle and wreak havoc on all of us intermittently. But I fight her constant cascade of long fur around the house.  I vacuum and clean constantly and still find tufts floating in the air or a poof of fur on the wood floors, even after I have just swept.  Right now she is lying on my hands as I endeavor to type this post, she is sighing in contentment with her paws near the track pad.  Now, I could grumble and moan about the constant upkeep my fur-sprinkling kitty creates but I am choosing to reframe my thinking and feel gratefulness for her presence in my life. Her trust as she lies in my arms, her little sighs of contentment as she sleeps and her willingness to come to me anytime I call  "little Willow" . I am thankful that I have to clean up fur because it allows me to enjoy my ornery kitty.

    As with the cat, I have a loud barking dog.  She does not take as much fur clean-up as the cat, but she makes her presence known.  There are a multitude of nose prints on my glass doors and low windows that she creates for me.  She barks at any dog and most animals on every television show or commercial that appears. She also barks at random leaves blowing across the driveway, the sound of squirrels running across the roof or owls hooting at night.  She really dislikes owls.  She can wake my husband and I out of a dead sleep with one high pitched yelp that acts as a defibrillator to my heart in the middle of the night.  Yet...I am so thankful for her.  She cuddles with me non-stop throughout my day, anytime when I am sitting.  She comforts me when I am sad and plays with me when I am joyful.  When Scott travels for work, she  sleeps right next to me so that I am not alone.  When I reframe my thinking to being grateful, I see what a blessing she is in my world.

    I am feeling grateful also for the freedom of choice in my life.  Choice is a huge blessing.  Choice is not a job like cleaning that is a boring necessity, but choice  is a conscious task that deserves gratefulness.    Choice includes little stuff like when I decide to decorate for Christmas. Each year I find myself getting out my decorations a bit earlier in the year because the holidays bring me so much joy.  I can be annoyed by all the comments of people complaining about "Christmas already?" or I can be thankful that I have a choice and can decorate and celebrate however and whenever I want to do it.  Choice also covers big things like government.  I am so thankful that I can choose who I want to vote for in the government that I live within.  It doesn't matter if my candidates win or lose, the mere fact that I have a voice and a choice is enough for me. Freedom is an enormous reason to feel thankful, and blessed.

    As everyone enters this holiday season, I fervently pray that they find time to put aside all the little "annoyances" in their lives, take time to pray, and reframe any negative thoughts to ones of gratefulness, thankfulness and feeling blessed in all things.  

God's blessings to you all!  

Aging gracefully? I can only hope...

     I ran into a friend at the farmer's market on Saturday.  She asked why I had not posted in quite a while....well, I haven't, but I didn't realize how long it had truly been.  I looked up the date today and saw that my last post was last December.  So that's almost 7 months ago.  Where does the time go?  

    I know one place the time went, it went in anticipation of a big birthday last April.  Usually I absolutely adore birthdays.  I love having birthday parties for my family and I love my own birthday.  However last year I dreaded my  approaching birthday for the first time that I can remember.  This April I turned 60.  

    In the end, it was really no big deal.  The earth didn't open and swallow me up.  Nothing changed in my world actually at all. It was the number I feared, not the actual body age.  This  last year I have done so much ruminating about my life and where I am in the process of living  while I have been anticipating turning 60.  I hope I have learned a few things in the process.  I know I have made some changes for the better, but I hope that I can continue to learn and follow the changes I have made.  

    One thing I did last May was stop drinking alcohol of any kind.  At first it was very hard for me to do, particularly in social situations.  I fondly consider myself a high functioning introvert.  I can be happy and social with others, but afterwards I need to decompress and recover .  Having alcohol definitely eased my social interactions with others.  But over time, I found I was finding more and more reasons to have a drink.  It is very easy to find reasons you need or want to drink.  It is much more difficult to remember and enact all the reasons you should not drink.  For my health, and the way I want to comport myself I decided that  I wanted to pursue an entirely sober lifestyle.  So far, so good.  I had my one year anniversary of that decision in May.  I feel good physically.  My skin is so much healthier and I don't regret making this decision.  I still feel anxious in social situations, but I order my diet soft drink and persevere onward.  Nowadays you get the true authentic me, and all the foibles that entails. =-)

    Another revelation I have made (more recently) is to stop looking back and ground myself in the present.  Have we all heard this advice FOR-E-VER? Yes.  We have.  So why has it taken me this long to begin living it?  Wish I knew. 

 I have another bad habit of comparing myself to others.  Not in possessions, but in personal circumstances such as body image.  I decided that I was turning 60, and I needed to stop this unhealthy habit.  Then, I began to look back at my own pictures over the years, comparing how I look today versus 5, 10, even 20 years ago.  I found (low and behold) I have aged!  Duh.  I sillily felt frustrated that I have more pounds, more wrinkles and more bumps or bulges.  That's when I learned that just as I can't compare myself to others who are different from me, I also can't compare myself now to a younger version of myself.  I will never be that age again and through living and enjoying life, I have used this body God blessed me with and it shows that I have.  I need to love the person I am today and enjoy where I am at in this earthly process.  Not wish for the body I used to have.  Twenty years from now I am certain I will see a picture of myself now and think, wow....I looked pretty good back when I was 60.  

    Finally, I have decided to continue to doggedly pursue my love and learning of God and His teachings.  I have never stopped doing this over my lifetime,  but my furtiveness has definitely waxed and waned throughout my years.  This last year I have read and studied through church, a small grow group at church and wonderfully also with my sister. I look forward to continuing this with joy and happiness.  

Has turning 60 changed me?  Not markedly, definitely not obviously, but I hope with this age and all the others that God chooses to bless me with I will thank God for each day and enjoy whatever I am given.  Prayers for all my family and friends and thanks Sheila for the encouragement to post.  ;-) .